Lily Collins just welcomed her first child via surrogacyâand the response to her announcement proves we desperately need an open dialogue about the process.
Gestational surrogacy is an increasingly popular, and increasingly visible, option for individuals and couples looking to have kids. Though the procedures and arrangements have been around since the â80s, the intensive and expensive process is out of reach for many and often goes undiscussed. But in Hollywood, more and more celebrities are opening up about the decision to use a surrogate, whether for medical reasons or practical ones. (Many same-sex couples, for instance, choose surrogacy.)
On January 31, Emily In Paris star Lily Collins thanked her âincredible surrogateâ while announcing the birth of her daughter with husband Charlie McDowell. And while McDowell says they are âoverjoyed and very gratefulâ for all the âkind messages and loveâ they received in response, the filmmaker also had a message for those who replied to the post with âhateful words.â
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âItâs ok to not be an expert on surrogacy. Itâs ok to not know why someone might need a surrogate to have a child,” McDowell wrote in the post’s comments section. “Itâs ok to not know the motivations of a surrogate regardless of what you assume. And itâs ok to spend less time spewing hateful words into the world, especially in regards to a beautiful baby girl who has brought a lot of love into peopleâs lives. Thatâs all for now because she just pooped and I need to change her diaper.â
Here’s a bit of surrogacy 101 for those who need it: In the surrogacy process, sperm and eggs from the parents and/or donors are used to create embryos, which are then implanted in the gestational carrier via in vitro fertilization (IVF). The carrier is typically not the egg provider, so while they may birth the child, they are not biological parents.
IVF has come under attack since the Supreme Court overturned Roe v. Wade in 2022, so it’s more important than ever that women and men speak openly about their reproductive rights and options. If youâre thinking of exploring surrogacy, discuss all the legal, financial, and other logistical aspects with your doctor as well as the potential emotional effects. And scroll through this slideshow of celebrities who’ve spoken about welcoming their own children through the surrogacy process.
